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People make their choices, but I think a non-judgmental description of these six kinds of affairs (but with a tinge of humor) can help people deal with them with greater awareness and responsibility. John and Kim met through work and felt a strong physical attraction. The lust affair is often short-lived, and passion can slide downhill pretty fast as the excitement declines or under-riding emotional issues surface again.
It can also fade if the lovers discover that there wasn't much connecting them beyond sex.
Neither Bill nor Tina, his sister-in-law, looked seriously at the issues in their respective marriages or inter-locked families; or even how dangerous it was.
Postscript: One of their spouses eventually discovered the incriminating e-mails, and the family affair quickly turned into a family nightmare. Humans are experts at creating illusions for ourselves.
Safe and discreet, a perfect solution for me." She decided it was a rational alternative to the disruption of divorce.
Of course, the public always enjoys being titillated with stories of the affairs of public figures, especially when hypocrisy is exposed.
His adamant refusal to go to couples therapy pushed her into acting on her anger.
The available partner believes that the other really will leave his or her spouse, given enough time and patience. " But that takes two equally available and committed people.But cultural attitudes have clearly shifted towards acceptance of affairs.They're seen as a lifestyle choice; an option for men and women yearning for excitement or intimacy that's lacking or has dulled during a marriage.But she couldn't create a solution, nor figure out how to deal with her desire for revenge.She knew that "getting back" at her husband wasn't going to produce empowerment or healing, but nevertheless began a disastrous affair.
Given that new reality, I put together what I've learned about the psychology of affairs, their meaning and their consequences for people in our current culture. We ended up in bed, as well as a lot of other places! The liberating and compelling feeling from this kind of affair, though, can mask hidden emotional conflicts.